worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize
