Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I touched a dick in church today
Randomize
