ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
