There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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