I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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