Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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