brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Randomize
