I just threw up on my dentist
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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