I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
she pinky promised me she was 18
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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