My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
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