so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Randomize
