look no pants
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize