I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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