Nicole vs. Life
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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