the new term for farting is butt boxing.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
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