He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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