I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Randomize