i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
