Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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