she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
So much rum. So many feels.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
