Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
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