I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize