I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
i think im in europe. pls send help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize