dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
He did a backflip because drugs
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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