Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
