I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
They have beer where we have blood.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
