so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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