I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
