NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Houston, we have a blender
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize