the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Randomize
