speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
