even my farts smell like vagina
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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