So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
