In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
