youre lurking in front of me
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
The Olympian is in my bed
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
