problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
