Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
