I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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