youre lurking in front of me
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
