I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
