Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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