I didn't shave. On purpose
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Randomize
