I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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