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Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
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