You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize