last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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