Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
