I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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