i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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