we have officially lost it.
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
